Precious time

Well, I have been gone a while.

Time is precious and always stretched a little more than we like it to be, especially if you are also a full time carer. What time I call my own is often needed for a bit of peace and head clearing. A good walk usually does the trick. Sometimes when ‘caree’ is out of the house, I need to sleep a while as it is the only sleep I get when I am not subconsciously listening out for him. (Did I mention he is deaf as well as having Aspergers?) For those of you who’ve had the experience – remember listening for your young baby in the night? Still doing it 23 years later).

In the time since I last wrote, my son applied for and got a place at University, from a local campus, so he stays at home. I am hugely proud of him. And we are on another crazy journey. He is perfectly capable of understanding the level of work (phew!) but try explaining ‘academic writing’ to that mind. We were discussing research and referencing: ‘Why should I write an essay about what everyone else has already said? Read their book.’ As ever, logical and right!! I finally got around it by getting him to tell me what he knew about the topic, then asking, ‘where’s your evidence?’ The essay, all 2000 words, was finished yesterday.

Being his PA is not all I’ve been managing to do though. I am some 12000 words into my latest novel and finding the journey very different from my previous work. It is set in two geographical locations, so I am having to do a lot of research. There are historical and political factors that I have to get right, while keeping the timeline of my story working. And I’ve been devouring other writers who have touched on those countries and stories to enrich my understanding and check the story hasn’t already been written by someone else! It is a mammoth task, and I hope I’m up to it. Still, there’s a long winter ahead…always a good time to knock a story out.

From Page to Stage

Thanks to the previous success writing and performing my one-woman show (From Within)I was asked to run a couple of workshops at the oldest (as in first) UK Arts Centre in Bridgwater, Somerset on Scriptwriting called from Page to Stage. It is linked with an autumn event in conjunction with another centre at Taunton: a scratch night. A scratch night is where actors take scenes of brand new writing to the stage so the writer and audience can see how well it works in action. It’s very exciting for new writers to see their words come to life. I have been through the process as both actor and writer so I am very pleased to be involved in a different role this time; inspiring new playwrights to develop their work.

The first workshop was so much fun the participants requested an extra date. So this Saturday at 10.30am we will be doing a session on Character. Our final session as regards the scratch night will be July 9^th when we’ll be working on Plot.

It gives me a real buzz to be able to share creative journeys with other writers. It is always a two-way street (as those of us on the BWAPpublishing Programme have learned from one another). We all educate one another in our different approaches, methods, and motivation.

I’m really looking forward to the next two sessions, and I suspect the actor in me may just have to get involved in the scratch night too!

The crumpet

Darling Aspie son had been doing brilliantly: learning to make his own breakfast, and eat it. So, I have an early appointment and the night before, he and I discuss breakfast so he is prepared. I set out cereal and waffles assuring him that the latter take 30 seconds in the toaster. "And how am I supposed to time that?" he says.
"Okay. Do it in the microwave instead." He looks dubious. Shakes his head. "No. I will phone you and you can tell me when it is 30 seconds. Or I might burn the house down."
"Not with an empty microwave."
"It might."
Hmmm. That's not going to work then.
I have a brain wave. I'll leave him a crumpet." Pop it in the toaster, you don't have to time it. When it pops up, It's ready".
Next morning, I head off happily, knowing he will have breakfast in my absence.You can imagine my thrill when I come home at lunch time to empty breakfast plates.

"Hey, well done! You had your crumpet. What did you do with it?" I beamed.
He gives me the look. " I just ate it. I wasn't going through all that again."

Oh well...

Cyber-Ego

‘I am in cyberspace, therefore I am not’.

‘Not what?’

‘Not real. Not me. Not myself. Someone else, if I choose.’

‘Why would you choose to be other than yourself?’

‘Because this self, in this life is…small. Insignificant. When it speaks no-one listens.’

‘No-one?’

‘No-one. Its voice is dull. Its opinions gleaned from up there. Out there. Inflicted by those who know.’

‘Know what?’

‘Everything that one is meant to believe.’

‘And do you?’

‘What?’

‘Believe what is told?’

‘No.’

‘Then you have your own opinions. Do you not?’

‘Yes, I suppose. Sometimes. When I am not me.’

‘When you are the other you – the one in cyberspace.’

‘That’s right.’

I find forums distressing at times. For some people they become a space where their ego can dominate. They say what they want…that’s okay. They express their opinions, however narrow or negative…that’s okay too. Perhaps they say things they wouldn’t have the courage to say in a face-to-face situation.

Perhaps that is because they forget that the other cyber-voices are real people. They are forgetting to notice the tone and subtlety of the message.

In this techy time of Facebook and Twitter and Blogging, I am endeavouring to remember that these are real people I am communicating with. I am doing my best to remain true to myself. I shall certainly do my best to remember my manners!

Keep your cyber-ego real.

Making a speech (to the NHS)

Yesterday I had the honour, with knocking knees, to speak at a conference about how the Acute Hospitals look after people with Learning Disabilities. This is a result of taking part in a review process in the South West, following the harrowing findings of the Mencap report: Death by Indifference (among others).
I knew exactly what I wanted to say. That wasn't the problem. The tricky bit was getting the pitch right. I was speaking as a mother about my child, and on behalf of all the parents with special children that I know and do not know. The other speakers were largely in the medical profession or linked to it, and of a mindset and level of understanding. It fell to me to bring it home - a huge responsibility.

I delivered my piece with a large photo of my son behind me, his head in bandages after his last surgery. When I heard the audience chuckle, I knew I had them onside. When I met them teary-eyed afterwards, I knew I had done my job.

It is very difficult to stand up as yourself and deliver a personal message - trust me, it is much easier to act! But to see and hear the impact of your honesty is priceless. I'm glad I put myself through it.

By popular demand (seriously!) a video of the speech will be recorded to the Review website very soon. I will post the link when it's ready.

Simple fact-everything we live through is a life lesson. Sharing it helps.

21st century writers

Any serious writer needs to be reading Robert McCrum On Books.  Via the Observer website. Things are changing fast and gone are the days of the faceless author, tucked away in their garret, scribbling their stories for the world while walking anonymously amongst its populace.

It’s a tough call. Some of us really didn’t want fame or recognition. Not in the actual face to face sense. Yes, recognise my name on a book – buy it because you know I’m good, but pass me by in the street and I can enjoy my secret satisfaction.

No more.

Welcome to the 21^st century. Welcome to the modes of communication of, in the first instance for many, your children.

I hadn’t even got over the immediacy of the mobile phone…”No, you don’t need to answer your mate during Sunday lunch.”

“Yes, I do, he knows I know he’s called. It’s rude not to.”

Spare me from understanding that logic.

But here’s the thing.

This is the new logic. We are all available, in all ways, to all people.

If we are not – they’ll just move on to someone who is. It’s time to take a deep breath, enlist the help of the ‘kids’ and get on Facebook, Twitter, create a website and become visible! These are the days of talking to your audience – and not just through your stories.

Horses and Poo

The darling Aspie loves Science and animals. He wants a job. Science technician in a vet's lab would be ideal. BUT he doesn't do poo. Perhaps this is why his preferred, as in totally adored, choice of animal is the cat. (Takes its poo away somewhere else).
So, with a few negotiations he is now doing a bit of volunteering at a nearby equine centre and apparently poo is a lot less awful if it's on the end of a long shovel. And if the happy horse is nudging you with love.
Small steps. Smiling son.